Meglos

(Series 18, Episodes 5-8)

Summary: Science takes on superstition over a dodecahedron on the planet of the dodgy blonde wigs.  A pair of imbecilic bounty hunters offer up a Jacob Rees-Mogg lookalike as a sacrifice and are menaced by a large cactus (don’t question how the cactus managed to work all those computers with no fingers).  Said cactus traps the Doctor and Romana in a phenomenally boring fold in time which they are forced to ham-act their way out of and Romana suffers the fate of so many Doctor Who companions when she is attacked by a plant.  Despite everyone being very confused by the Doctor’s cactus-face doppelganger, Meglos is defeated and the people of Tigella learn to live and work side by side in peace and harmony.

Watch it because: Jacqueline Hill.  Need I say more?

Original Air Date: 27 September – 18 October 1980.

Doctor: Tom Baker.

Companions: Romana (Lalla Ward) & K9 Mk II (Voiced by John Leeson).

Writer: John Flanagan and Andrew McCulloch.

Director: Terence Dudley.

Producer: John Nathan-Turner.

The Leisure Hive

(Series 18, Episodes 1-4)

Summary: JNT has arrived and everything gets an update - neon logo, synth music and a new, questionable wardrobe for the Doctor.  Plus, tachyonics, based on some real gen-u-ine science, gets an airing.  There’s a fabulous opening scene on Brighton beach where Romana accidentally kills K9 during a game of fetch.  The Argolins sport crazy beehives but suffer from dramatic rapid ageing and the tension with the lizards outside is well built up.  Luckily, there’s a magical reset button and Argolin Mena gets every parent’s dream - a chance to raise her son again and get it right.

Watch it because: We’re in the eighties now.

Original Air Date: 30 August – 20 September 1980.

Doctor: Tom Baker.

Companions: Romana (Lalla Ward) & K9 Mk II (Voiced by John Leeson).

Writer: David Fisher.

Director: Lovett Bickford.

Producer: John Nathan-Turner.

The Horns of Nimon

(Series 17, Episodes 17-20)

Summary: Histrionic Soldeed tries to sacrifice the young of Aneth to bull-headed Nimons in the power complex.  The Doctor attempts to give K9, his robotic dog, mouth-to-mouth, the Nimons don’t really have a clue what’s going on (must be that massive head impeding their vision) and Soldeed’s dreams of conquest are offed along with him.  The Anethans wear rather fetching yellow pyjamas and exchange such killer dialogue as:

“What are they doing?”

“I don’t know.”

“Why don’t you know?”

“I don’t know.”

Watch it because: It gives me the opportunity to share this masterpiece:

Original Air Date: 22 December 1979 – 12 January 1980.

Doctor: Tom Baker.

Companions: Romana (Lalla Ward) & K9 Mk II (Voiced by David Brierley).

Writer: Anthony Read.

Director: Kenny McBain.

Producer: Graham Williams.

Nightmare of Eden

(Series 17, Episodes 13-16)

Summary: Two spaceships materialise on top of each other and the crews proceed to bicker about liability as though they’ve had a low speed collision reversing out of a space in a supermarket car park.  The Doctor and Romana attempt to mediate and salvage the situation but things are complicated by Professor Tryst, a scientist with a collection of alien slaves and a dodgy accent, and the fact that crew members and passengers keep getting mauled to death.  In the end, it all turns out to be about drug smuggling. Romana is pretty wet and the Mandrels are ridiculous Muppet rejects, but they do have lovely flares.

Watch it because: Despite its flaws, it’s an interesting morality tale about the drugs trade.

Original Air Date: 24 November – 15 December 1979.

Doctor: Tom Baker.

Companions: Romana (Lalla Ward) & K9 Mk II (Voiced by David Brierley).

Writer: Bob Baker.

Director: Alan Bromly.

Producer: Graham Williams.

The Creature from the Pit

(Series 17, Episodes 9-12)

Summary: Romana plugs in the Doctor’s phone and finds a whole load of missed calls and is none too pleased to be manhandled by hairy bandits with a limited vocabulary.  There’s monopoly in space and killer tumbleweed controlled by a whip (and doesn’t that guy look happy to be cracking it?)  The Doctor literally jumps into a hole and then gets menaced by a giant potato with a humongous cock.

Watch it because: "Well, to be fair I did have a couple of gadgets which he probably didn't, like a teaspoon and an open mind."

Original Air Date: 27 October – 17 November 1979.

Doctor: Tom Baker.

Companions: Romana (Lalla Ward) & K9 Mk II (Voiced by David Brierley).

Writer: David Fisher.

Director: Christopher Barry.

Producer: Graham Williams.

City of Death

(Series 17, Episodes 5-8)

Summary: Doctor Who meets its first crack in time as Romana, inexplicably dressed like a 1920s' schoolgirl, and the Doctor take a romantic trip to France.  The soundtrack made me momentarily think I was watching a seventies' arthouse film about people running urgently around Paris but then the saxes kick in and we’re in a sleazy crime thriller about a convoluted art heist.  Some famous art lovers turn up to critique the TARDIS, spaghetti head Scaroth the Jagaroth is splintered across time and poor old Duggan just needs a drink.

Watch it because: Doctor Who’s French Connection: we’ll always have Paris.

Original Air Date: 29 September – 20 October 1979.

Doctor: Tom Baker.

Companions: Romana (Lalla Ward).

Writer: “David Agnew” (David Fisher, Douglas Adams & Graham Williams).

Director: Michael Hayes.

Producer: Graham Williams.

Destiny of the Daleks

(Series 17, Episodes 1-4)

Summary: We’re caught in a (logic) trap!  In Doctor Who’s favourite location, the quarry, K9 is written out rather preposterously with laryngitis and for reasons unknown Romana regenerates and tries on bodies with the ease of trying a new coat.  Romana and the Doctor engage in a comedy sketch routine before things turn a bit serious and the shooting starts.  The Morvellans have borrowed the Swampies’ wigs and sprayed them silver, the Daleks are shoutier and bluer than ever before and are back to using humans to do their mining (I guess it’s hard to hold a pickaxe with a plunger).  Like an elderly relative, Davros sits and sulks in his chair and the Doctor sends a Dalek into a meltdown with his hat.

Watch it because: Cobwebby Davros awakens…

Original Air Date: 1 – 22 September 1979.

Doctor: Tom Baker.

Companions: Romana II (Lalla Ward).

Writer: Terry Nation.

Director: Ken Grieve.

Producer: Graham Williams.